Vista of Dreams

Last night I had a dream that my roommate was in a gang.

Now I didn’t exactly realize this fact since the dream took place much earlier. I was still at my current college, but it was moving-in day and the campus was entirely shifted. I had a bunk bed and we were in mostly the same location. The campus felt much more.. fake. As if it was a front for something. Don’t ask me how I had this feeling.

My parents left after they helped me move in, and I was still with my current roommate, and things went on for about a week. He had friends come over, I went to my classes (which I forget what they entailed), and I played guitar when I could. His friends were for the most part what I remember (vaguely) his friends in real life resemble, and they would come over to talk to him about things while I paid no mind and did my own business. This had some ramifications.

One day, I think it was a Tuesday in my dream, I went to an all purpose store that mostly resembled a Michaels or a Wal-Mart. I was in the children’s books and construction paper section when someone stole something. This someone was a man in a gray hoodie that shouted he’d kill someone if they tried to stop him. He was running for the exit door — I had to stop him. He sprinted past the aisle. I thrust my shopping cart into his legs. As his knees began to buckle I went in to hit him on the back of the head when I saw him turn around.

It was my roommate.

He stared confusingly into my eyes then bolted for the exit door. The manager came up and asked me why I let him go. I continued to follow my roommate out the exit. There he was meeting with some of his friends behind the store and I left unnoticed and headed back to the dorm. My roommate didn’t return for a few days.

During this time I made some friends with a sophomore named Alex and two girls. I can’t remember their names. The only significant detail was they were mostly jerks. I’m not sure why I was friends with them. I met them at a cafeteria, then we took our lunch to go eat somewhere in the back lots of the campus.

Behind campus there was this beautiful forest. I can discern that it was fall from the tint of the leaves all being yellow or orange and a few leaves crunched as we walked towards this back area, that had one road leading to the other dorms from the campus. Other than the forest and the river behind it, there was this incredible structure. It was a tunnel made out of bikes that went above the road.

It’s difficult to describe this architecture, but it was a tunnel of metal rings that coiled with bikes hanging from every side of it. It served as the storage place for all the bikes of this area, and it was, functionally at least, a bridge. I seemed to be the only one astonished by this marvel, as the others walked across the road and I made my way through this metal behemoth. By the time I got to the other side, there was a car pulled under the bridge. Out walked some of my roommate’s friends, who accused me of “knowing too much.” Alex and the others ran away leaving me alone, and I ran for a store that was down the road.

Suddenly it was night, and in my dream my perspective changed to being inside this store, where I frantically called my parents while the gang went through the entire store trying to find me. I managed to elude them in the storage areas and actually got a quick shift job to blend in with the employees. I went to restock in the back behind the locked doors for a while, trying to waste time until my parents arrived.

I was a mess in tears thinking that death waited for me outside this door, but so did my parents — but they lived hours away, and the men holding instruments of fate a mere second. My parents didn’t believe me when I first called, and only after repeated screams did they finally listen, then I heard a bang at the storage door. They knew where I was.

I made a run for the exit where the supply trucks came. I ran across the street of the busy four-lane road and hid behind a newspaper stand. There was no one on this side of the road, but plenty of cars going by, and I could see inside the store the gang members frantically searching. My dream ended with my crying behind a garbage can on the other side of the road, waiting for my parents to pick me up.

Interpretation: I think this dream is reflective of how I feel about college so far. I don’t have any real friends here, and spend most of my time on Skype talking to people I wish I could personally be with. Now that I’ve come to the realization that my parents are going to move away, I don’t want to stay here. I don’t want to be away from my parents. I’m not responsible enough to handle myself, and the idea of conflict is frightening. While I doubt I’ll be getting involved in any serious affairs such as a gang fight in my life, it’s still a worrisome concept that I would never be able to handle on my own.

My parents are a shelter, and out here I don’t have a shelter, or privacy. The only thing I have is a false sense of independence with my roommate being here all the time. I can never move on or grow up so long as I’m not alone, I feel — but I don’t want to leave my parents. I never do. Does that make me immature? Am I underdeveloped because I want to stay in their care? I don’t think so. It’s the same mentality I feel that drives the basement-dwelling forty year olds that continue to live with their parents. While I never want to end in this situation, I think once I feel more prepared for the real world I wouldn’t have such a problem.

Part of me wishes I made the leap to go to Japan this summer, but the other is still worried how I would, or wouldn’t, be able to handle such responsibility. Hell, I can’t even wake myself from these dreams in time to handle priorities in the waking world. I’m beginning to feel more and more that my dreams are a way of God telling me where to go and what to do, offering further analysis that I can’t take in myself without rendering my conscious mind ineffective in the examination of my being.

I’ll be going with my family to Florida when they move.

Last night I had a dream I went to Ohayocon.

I believe this was spurred on by, well, Ohayocon taking place this weekend and my undoubted excitement; but, it wasn’t the Ohayocon at the Greater Columbus Convention Center, it was this strange store across the street from my local Wal-Mart back in Lewis Center, right off of 23. Right across the parking lot there was a makeshift building (how it was “makeshift,” I’m not too sure. It’s not like you can make a building for a weekend.) but I just knew it was a temporary structure for the sole purpose of the convention.

It had the atmosphere of a Sam’s Club department store, with the high ceilings and the large steel fans dotting the cement beams. I assume this was the “dealer’s room” of the convention, since this is where I gained a form of consciousness within the dream. I found this especially strange since one of my worries was my acquiring of a pass for the convention, and normally they ask for a pass before you enter the dealer’s room (which is really the only time they check.) Perhaps this was a foreshadowing to relieve my stress, since I didn’t obtain a preregistration pass like I should have. Again.

The first stop I made inside this store was of the Anime Palace dealer, who I’ve seen plenty throughout living in Columbus. The only difference being he was the only one there with a selection of anime and manga. The entire rest of the convention was just merchandise or clothing. This could be a reflection of my desire for some new series to find, since I was on a hunt for some show. I can’t remember. I think it was.. agh. Some boxset with the Escaflowne movie and — it’s escaping me. Some other 80s anime that I didn’t really care for, but since it was only 20$, why not? And hey, it came with a pretty good movie.
EDIT: I just remembered it was Yu-Yu Hakusho and.. Real Bout High School maybe? Some other obscure show I like.

My friend Drew and my father were there roaming around, but mostly it was me exploring this department store full of a lame selection. Eventually I made my way out of the store to the parking lot outside, where the sun was shining incredibly bright. On one chair was the guy that was supposed to check our passes when we went in, so I had to get past him at some point to get in, but I don’t remember. Dreams take place at the weirdest times.

My sister was waiting outside with my mother, who was bored as usual with all of this “Japanimation nonsense” my father and I love so much. He took my sister in a shopping cart and went across the parking lot to Wal-Mart while my mother sat in the shade outside the convention building, so I decided to follow them, as did Drew.

We entered in the pharmacy section of the store and made our way through the cosmetics while my dad and sister went to the bathroom. I think that’s probably why they went there in the first place. I guess the convention didn’t have any bathrooms..? Regardless, this was one of the moments that shocked me the most. I’m not sure why, but the layout of this bathroom was so strange. I’ll just have to give you a picture.

It was so cramped, and there were doors for the urinals..?

I wasn’t too sure what I was supposed to do at there, because it was wide open to everyone walking down the aisles if I took the urinal in the center. It was strange, to say the least. But why this stood out to me more than anything is what I can’t pick. Maybe it’s a manifestation of discomfort..? Or maybe my brain was controlling my bladder at the same time in my dream. I got no clue.

After a stop to the bathroom, Drew and I continued to the toy section where we found the Lego department. Yea, a department solely for Legos. There was a basket full of unassembled pieces, but on top of it was a fully constructed X-Wing fighter. That means some kid took the time to assemble that entire thing. Somehow this didn’t surprise me so much during the dream, since it seemed like a child’s paradise in this section with plenty of kids just running around looking at all the constructed marvels. Looking back on it, Wal-Mart is probably the worst place to let your kid run around without supervision.

Another thing that stood out was a remote-controlled Darth Vader figure that cost $97.79 (again, just a weird detail that I recall) and had some crazy number of articulation. This was also hanging up on the back wall as some almost mantle-piece for the entire section. “Hey kids! Check out this out!”

After I saw the Darth Vader things get a little hazy, but we walked around Wal-Mart a bit more doing some shopping, for groceries. I think that’s when I woke up. I can’t shake a feeling I’m forgetting one detail, though. Trying to recall it has all of these past dreams melding together, so I’ll let it go for now, and maybe it’ll come back to me later.

That is a salient point though. All of my dreams seem to be somehow connected in one plane of existence that’s manifested only in my dreams. I can see locales dreams of mine took place in when I was three years old all the way up to last week. It’s like an intertwined world where everything I think of takes place. I’m also an avid lucid dreamer, so most of it turns into my playground once I realize I’m dreaming and start to do whatever I want. I might post some tips on lucid dreaming for those looking to try it out for themselves.

For the majority of my time on the Internet, I’ve spent it looking for cheap laughs and finding friends. While I will continue to do so — I have a website with the function of multi-blogging, and should take that opportunity to get started on an idea I’ve had for quite some time: chronicling my dreams.

While this will mostly serve as my morning routine to write them down, I would like somewhere to turn in the future to see if they meant anything, or I applied what they might have meant. I am of the mindset that the dreams tell something about ourselves or the world around us.

If we perceive reality through a lens of bias brought on by our biology, upbringing, and beliefs, who is to say the world we see in our mind is any different than the one we see with our eyes?